Custody and the Single Dad
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Custody and the Single Dad

What do you do when the "baby's momma" doesn't want to let you have visitation? I get this question a lot from guys who are dads but aren't married to the mother of their child(ren). In fact, I was just in Court dealing with this common situation just yesterday.

Oftentimes couples believe they can work things out without formalizing anything. I will ask a client if they have an actual parenting plan drawn up with the other parent. Most times they do not. People simply assume they have inherit parenting rights. When they don't get their usual visits with their kids like they are used to, they call law enforcement who's hands are tied. Nothing can be done because there's no Court sanctioned parenting plan.

The first legal course of action is to file what's called a Petition to Determine Paternity,Timesharing, and Child Support. A filing fee of $137 is usually required along with the necessary request and notice of hearing. The Court will schedule a hearing and begin the legal process.

The first issue is paternity---legally deciding who the biological father is. This is done either by agreement, the birth certificate, or DNA. Once the Court determines that Dad is Dad, the next issue is deciding a parenting plan/timesharing.

In New Mexico, the law favors joint legal custody which means that both parents have a say in the upbringing of their children even if the parent doesn't have physical custody. Both parents are to be involved in deciding medical care, education, religion, social and extracurricular activities, etc. The parenting plan outlines these details and contains timesharing.

The timesharing schedule contains the nut and bolts of the actual custody arrangement. Timesharing can be manipulated without substantively changing custody. Although they sound alike, custody and timesharing aren't quite the same thing. Custody is a legal status while timesharing is the visitation schedule.

Alongside the custody portion of the case is also child support. The law presumes that parents will support their children financially. Child support is determined using a worksheet. An online worksheet is available on the New Mexico Department of Human Services website. Worksheet A is utilized when one parent is the primary physical custodian. Worksheet B is used in cases of 50/50 custody.

Child support is roughly 17% of the noncustodial parent's gross income for one child and up to 19% or so for more children. There's a lot more that goes into it but that's a rough rule of thumb. The Court can deviate from the statutory requirements in some unique circumstances. Folks on certain social security disability can exclude this income from child support calculations. And finally the Court can impute your income if you're underemployed. That means they can assume you are earning min. wage even if you're out of work. A child support worksheet must be attached to the custody order so custody, timesharing, and child support are addressed in these cases.

Sometimes the custodial parent refuses to allow the other parent visits because of unpaid child support. This is unacceptable and it's unlawful. When this happens it's time to go back to Court. The law is ever changing and the stakes are high---they're your kids. It's important to begin this process if you haven't done so. Without a formalized parenting plan and custody arrangement you have no vested rights!

If you have further questions, please contact me.

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